There was no sign of the wedding ceremony, just a celebration of love and support.When I was a kid, I struggled a lot with how I looked—I was convinced I was really unattractive. One day, while staring at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t hold back and tearfully asked, “Why do I look so ugly?” My dad, walking by, overheard me and said, “Oh, didn’t you know? Before you were born, I accidentally sent my dashing good looks to the wrong address. But don’t worry, I kept the receipt!” I stared at him, confused, “The receipt?” “Yep,” he said with a grin. “So when you turn 18, we can exchange it for something even better—like a personality so charming that no one will notice what you think is ‘ugly.’ Trust me, it’s a better deal.” I couldn’t help but laugh through my tears. My dad winked and added, “Until then, you’re stuck with that face—and it’s a pretty good one if you ask me.”
When I failed my first year at university, my parents didn’t get angry or upset. My mom sat down next to me while I was bawling my eyes out in shame, and hugged me until I calmed down. She said it wasn’t the end of my life, and that she was, and always will be, proud of me.My parents are very open-minded and accepting people, I remember multiple times when my siblings and I were young they would say, “We don’t care what or who you are,” and that really stuck with me because I’m Bisexual. When I actually came out to them, both of them never backed out of their word and have accepted me for who I am. My mom and I even discuss LGBT topics over tea, and my dad won’t stop with the puns.My parents are not perfect, but they did a lot of things right. The biggest one that sticks out to me is that they’re supportive of things my brother and I like, even when they don’t understand or like it. They didn’t care for skateboarding, but they spent hundreds of dollars over the years for my brother to enjoy his hobby. They not only helped me get a drum set but allowed the band to hold practice in our basement and drove us to all our shows. They wanted me to be a lawyer, but they were willing to settle for a line cook. It made a difference in the long run because eventually, it helped me realize that I get to make my own choices in life — nothing is laid out for me. I can do whatever I enjoy, and my parents will be there for me, cheering me on.My dad was exceptionally fair. Any conflict would be solved by sitting down and having me evaluate multiple perspectives. If we could reason through an issue, and it appeared someone had indeed treated me poorly/done the wrong thing and I was “in the right,” he would give me credit for that but then still work with me to find a way to resolve the issue with the other person. Vice versa, if I was wrong, he had a way of conversing with me that made me realize it on my own. I think this really helped in building some character traits I’m very grateful for, but it also built a child/parent relationship with mutual trust. I felt comfortable approaching my dad about anything. I knew he’d tell me about it if I was wrong, but I also knew he would back me if I was in the right. That was powerful, to feel respected as a teenagerWhen I was little, we lived near a freeway. I asked my mom one time how far the freeway went, and where we would be if we just got on it and kept driving. She had a map. Did she show it to me? Nope. She said, “Let’s see”. We hopped in the car and drove for hours until we were both tired of it, THEN pulled out the map and found a route home along the shore of one of the US Great Lakes. This was in the 80s, before GPS or cellphones. I was maybe 10, and she let me navigate home. She could have just told me or shown me on the map without leaving the couch, but she wanted me to know…Parent-child relationships can be challenging at times. However, some individuals seem to have hit the jackpot, blessed with amazing mothers and fathers who are always there to offer support.
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