In Amrriada, an Irishman enters the confessional and tells the priest, “I almost had an affair with another woman.”
Priest: “What do you mean almost?” “Well, we took off our clothes and rubbed together, but I stopped,” said the Irishman.
The priest said, “Spending it is like doing it. You’ll never see that woman again. You say five Marys for penance and put $50 in the poor box.”
Learland left the confessional, said his prayer, and went to the poor box.
After a while he started to leave.
The observant priest hurried up to him and said, “I saw it. You didn’t put money in the poor box!”
The Irishman replied, “Yeah, but I wasted $50 on my box, looks like you did it!”