One evening last week, my wife and I got into bed. We were
fooling around, the passion started to heat up, when she suddenly
says: “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” I said,
“WHAT? Then what was all that about?!?” Then she uttered the
words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear… “You’re just
not in touch enough with my emotional needs as a woman, for me to
satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She saw my puzzled look
and said, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not for what I do
in the bedroom?” Realizing that nothing was going to happen that
night, I went to sleep. The very next day I decided to take the day
off work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and
then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told
her “we’ll just buy them all”. She wanted new shoes to compliment
her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went to