One day, out of the blue, my ex showed up on my doorstep. It had been a while since I’d kicked him out, so seeing him standing there caught me off guard. He held out a plastic bag, and when I looked inside, there were a dozen eggs and a half-pound of bologna. Not exactly a gourmet care package.
I didn’t want to deal with the situation, so I just took the bag to get him to leave. No need for a confrontation over bologna on my front porch. I thought that was the end of it, just another strange encounter with my ex.
Later that same day, I ran into a mutual friend of ours. We chatted for a bit, and out of nowhere, he said, “Oh, I saw Alex today! He was going on and on about how he stocked your fridge from top to bottom.”
I almost burst out laughing right there. Stocked my fridge? With a dozen eggs and a half-pound of bologna? The audacity was unreal. Apparently, in his mind, he’d become some sort of grocery-delivering hero. I had to bite my tongue to keep from telling our friend the reality of his “big gesture.” It was so typical of Alex—always exaggerating and turning the smallest act into some grand achievement.
As funny as it was, it also reminded me why I kicked him out in the first place. That little encounter said a lot about who he was: someone who wanted credit for the bare minimum. But hey, at least I got some eggs and bologna out of it!
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